Guilt comes from a violation of our value system. Guilt says, "I made a mistake; I can ask forgiveness." Shame comes from an attitude of falling short, of being inadequate, worthless, and helpless. We can recognize shame by such thoughts as: "How can anyone like me? I am sicker than others. I am a bad person." Shame is our biggest obstacle to growth because it is tied to who we are. Certainly we cannot rid ourselves of who we are by asking forgiveness. Shame can be overcome when we realize that although we make mistakes, we are not bad people. As we are able to distinguish between guilt and shame, our growth can continue.
Let me be aware today of how I speak to myself. Remind me that I am loveable.
Guilt says, "I made a mistake." Shame says, "I am a mistake."
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